Change in Mindset

It’s incredible how much my thinking has changed since I began just considering moving abroad.

For every item I purchase, I think, “In nine months, can I / do I want to pack this, garage-sale it, or throw it away?”

Every time I approach a register with debit card in hand – even for meals – I think, “Do I want to spend this money here, now, in this way, or do I want to save it up for my adventure?”

I find myself looking around my apartment and cataloging the contents.  Take.  Sell.  Give away.  Throw away.  Store in my parents’ basement.  Hmm, think I can get ten bucks for that sleeping bag?

I’ve also found myself wondering exactly how much can be fit into a suitcase.

Piles of crafting detritus were strewn throughout my apartment awaiting organization.  Can I use them all up in time?  What will be left for me to give away?  I wonder if Jessica would like this yarn…

I drove to a craft store to buy Mod Podge and my heart sank as I thought, “I’m spending money to buy a 16oz jar of glue that I won’t be able to use up.”  Turning the corner down the aisle, my heart leaped when I saw it also comes in 8oz containers.

On the summit of Longs Peak, I wondered if it would be my last fourteener for a few years.

I hear about events and wonder if I’ll still be here.  My church’s new building opening.  The next Bolder Boulder.  Heather’s wedding.

While making pancakes for breakfast, I imagine grocery shopping where I can’t read the labels and try to think of some simple, fool-proof cooking plans beyond the Daniel diet.

At work, I think, “How will my replacement fill in for me?  Are my files in good order so s/he can find things when I’m gone?  Are processes outlined enough for him/her to know what to do?”

And walking home each day, I have a spring in my step.  “Next year I may be walking on another continent!”

Even if I end up decided to stay, this has already been an exciting adventure: learning to save more and spend less, discovering what I truly NEED to live day to day, and living each day as though it were one of the last.

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