Should I Stay or Should I Go?

It’s been so weird to see people’s reactions when I tell them about my idea to move abroad and have an adventure. They range from the are-you-off-your-rocker-suspicious-sideways glances to the oh-my-goodness-I’m-going-to-live-vicariously-through-you glee.

“That’s exciting!”

“What? Really?”

“I’d kill you.” (said in jest, of course)

“I’ll miss you a lot, but I’ll be supportive of whatever you choose.”

“[uncomfortable silence]”

“Wow, what an opportunity! You’ll never regret it.”

“Um, well, I’ll write a recommendation letter if you need one.”

“Do it!”

The above list is all things that have been said to me. The funny thing is, though, that most are also things I’ve said to myself. Some other things I’ve said to myself:

“Ugh, life is too boring.”

“You’ll fail! Depression’ll rear its ugly head.”

“I wish I didn’t have so much stuff in my life.”

“You should forget this and watch more Lost.”

It’s an understatement that I’ve been dragging my feet a bit – hence not writing as often. Part of me is just comfortable enough here in my life that I don’t want to leave it. I’ve been busy with some other things, too, but the truth is that I haven’t made pursuing this a priority lately.

But a commitment is doing the thing you said you’d do long after the mood in which you said it has left. And I made a commitment – at least to myself – to look seriously at this idea.

So I promise, I’ll try to write more. Writing’s the best way for me to process the jumble of thoughts and ideas so I’d better get to it!

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